How to develop correctly and effectively the capacity of expressing your feelings and emotions in the modern world
In this article, we will tell you how to correctly and effectively express your feelings and emotions and how to develop it.
Human emotionality is a trait around which the debate about the value and significance of its manifestations in life has never subsided. In different cultures, emotions are assigned different roles: from the shameful manifestation of weakness of character to the refinement and richness of the inner world. At the same time, no one succeeded in completely suppressing the expression of feelings and emotions; the point of dispute is only the degree of control and public manifestation.
There is no answer to the question whether it is good or bad to be an emotional and expressive person, because without being tied to a specific situation, it loses its meaning. In some cases, it is undesirable to show emotions:
- if you are intimidated, you cannot show fear;
- if a seller in the market tries to hike up the price, no interest should be shown;
- Pity should not be shown when punishing an employee for a serious misconduct in a revealing manner.
In other cases, you will not be able to achieve anything from a person without emotional expressiveness:
- you cannot declare your love with a stone face, otherwise they will not believe you;
- convincing a person to do your way, you need to infect him with personal interest;
- if you are treated unfairly, you should be indignant, protest and dissatisfied.
A person equally requires both skills, neither of which can be placed above the other.
Why is it difficult to express feelings and communicate without emotion? Emotional expressiveness is one way of exchanging information. Moreover, if words convey dry information, then emotions – the degree of importance and attitude of the speaker. Without expressing emotions, everything you say will sound as if you yourself are not interested, which means that the interlocutor is unlikely to be interested.
In the lessons of literate speech, emotional delivery is studied and trained at the same level as diction, breathing and voice power. Your words, a la “I can’t express my feelings and emotions,” are not an obstacle for the teacher. Thanks to such training, an outstanding speaker can be understood, even if his words are not heard, which most often happens in a large crowd.
Learn to be liberated
Least of all problems with the expression of feelings in young children who still do not know how to hide behind masks and restrain themselves. As they grow up, society presses on them more and more, concepts such as etiquette, decency, manners appear in their lives. You cannot speak too loudly, you cannot laugh too loudly, it is indecent to openly express surprise, discontent and much more. Under pressure, the child learns not to use emotions at all and only in adulthood realizes how wrong he was.
One of the ways to regain natural spontaneity and again learn to express your emotions and feelings is emancipation to the level of a child, when social norms and behaviors, prohibitions and prejudices were not in control of you.
To do this, observe the children, try to understand the reason for their immediate behavior. Very soon you won’t succeed, because the behavior of children does not need a reason, it is just the way nature intended it. Reasons are needed to lock up inside yourself and be afraid to say a word half a tone louder than everyone else. Children get pleasure from life, from themselves, from communication with other children, nothing prevents them from doing it.
The key to your liberation also lies through pleasure. After all, you love to rage with friends or with a loved one, do all sorts of stupid things when no one is looking at you, etc. You should do this more often, stop being ashamed of yourself and worry less about the opinions of others. Children, after all, do not worry too much about how they look from the outside, and for some reason everyone admires them.
Master the techniques
What is “technical” and how does this word apply to expressing feelings? When a person is unhappy, he frowns. There is nothing difficult in this mimic gesture: just knit your eyebrows and wrinkle your forehead, and everyone around you will think that you are unhappy. Usually this is not learned specifically, as the body reacts to a chemical reaction in the head, and the person does not even notice how he is giving a signal. But if there are problems with the signaling system, working out the external manifestations of the process can help for two reasons:
- Better deliberately than nothing.
- There is an inverse relationship between emotion and its expression.
Let’s take a closer look at the second point. Do an experiment on yourself: when you notice that your mood is poor, just smile. Do not remember anything, do not read jokes, do not watch humorous programs – smile for no reason, into space or to yourself. The result will be instant, you will feel warm and comfortable, you will want to hold on to a smile, and a bad mood, if it does not disappear completely, will noticeably lose ground.
This experience testifies to the peculiarities of the work of the subconscious mind, which does not differentiate cause and effect. Simply put, “I feel good, so I smile” and “I smile, so I feel good” – for the subconscious, one and the same statement. Thus, you can awaken emotions in yourself, starting from the end, that is, from their external signs in facial expressions, gestures, looks, movement, body behavior.
Train your voice, intonation and diction
The wider the vocal possibilities, which include intonation, the more shades of emotions a person can express, the more complete his interaction with others. The best way to develop the power of your voice is to practice, that is, to start using it more intensively and more often than usual. The main problem of dull, expressionless speech is the habit of speaking quietly and with restraint, which leads to the inability to use the voice fully and to the fear of revealing its potential. Hence the inability to express their feelings.
Psychologists recommend sometimes shouting at the top of your voice until you feel the weight off your shoulders. This should be done outdoors or in a specially designated place with sufficient soundproofing, for example, in a recording studio.
Copy, parody, portray others
Observation is the artist’s bread, with its help outstanding interpretations of classical roles are created on the stages of the best theaters in the world. All of them are taken straight from life, right from city streets, parks, public transport and queues. It’s hard to believe, but it’s true, because a person can never come up with a juicy characteristic image better than nature itself.
Use your own powers of observation to acquire or improve your expressive skills. Take a closer look at the people around, look for interesting images, remember, make situational plans, then try to revive what you saw. You can do this at home, but it’s best to enroll in an adult theater studio and learn to express your feelings correctly under the supervision of an experienced teacher.
Make yourself a creative hobby
Any kind of creativity contributes to liberation, including emotional. To create and express your feelings, you need to experience, think, feel and be able to interpret your various states into a kind of creative product – a work of art. The best options for a hobby are amateur theater, author’s song, or art reading. These forms of creativity stimulate external expressive skills, which will certainly come in handy in your work, for example, when conducting business negotiations or exploring new areas.